PSA: Stop Taking Yourself So Seriously


With every negative situation you're in there's always a way to extract positive feedback for the future. I don't know whether this holds true simply because I'm an optimist, but an example of this occurred yesterday during my training.

Week 3 of my program, time to shatter a deadlift personal record... at least I thought so. The "Deadlift Gods" had other plans however, and I missed my first ever deadlift where the bar broke off the floor. Every time I've failed previously, that sucker chose not to budge off the ground. This was different, though. Gravity beat me in these uncharted waters, check it out below:

I had two ways to react to this:

  1. Act all pissed off and disappointed in myself for what should have been a sure fire PR.
  2. Keep my chin up, chalk it up as an opportunity to learn and figure out the plan of attack going forward.

I chose option 2.

I'd be lying if I said there wasn't an ounce of disappointment in my body, but shit happens. It wasn't meant to be, and that's okay. It baffles me when a client of mine allows a missed rep or a mediocre set to get under their skin. I really appreciate the amount of effort and heart they put into their training, but 99.9% of the time this frustration just leads into a snowball effect of self-doubt for the entire session. Obviously, this is easier said than done.

If you have a disappointing workout, the most effective way to combat the negative thoughts swirling in your head is to step back and ask yourself who you are. Think about that for a second...

Who are you?

I'm a coach, first and foremost. My client's training experience comes before mine every single time. If I have to sacrifice the quality of my lifts for theirs, so be it. Deadlifting 530 pounds doesn't make me a better human being; it doesn't show that I'm a genuinely caring individual. It doesn't represent shit besides the total poundage I can pick up versus our gravitational pull.

Below is exactly why yesterday was a success by day's end:

Allison, who's been riddled with a variety of nagging injuries over the pst couple of years, ripped 185 for 4 pain-free reps in a conventional stance we've only practiced together for five weeks. This is far, far, far more significant to me than anything I could accomplish with a barbell.

So, what does me missing a deadlift have to do with you being able to enhance your life? For starters, this applies to much more than just the weight room setting. We all have bad days, it's just a part of life. Regardless of what life throws at you, always remember to take a step back and remember who you truly are.

We all have our go-to's that bring us peace and serenity. If I have a shit workout, I find satisfaction by ensuring that my next client has the best training session possible. The next time you're disappointed in yourself, analyze the situation at hand and what's causing this perception. It's probably not as serious as you're making it out to be.

I'm going to hit a 600-pound deadlift one day, and I'm enjoying the ride until I get there. There's going to be bumps in the road throughout, regardless of what you want to accomplish. Respect the process and enjoy it while it lasts.

There are no failures, only feedback.